Saving Pvt Swan
by Monkeybutt85
Summary: Set in Twilight/New Moon universe-AU After Edward leaves Bella in the forest she spirals into a pit of anger and desperate to connect to Edward anyway she can she makes a rash decision-she joins the US Army...This is her journey of self discovery. Character Death, Angst, Trigger Warnings, Self Harm, Implied non-consensual, angst, romance, Hurt/Comfort, (FxF)
1. Prologue

AU- Unfortunately or fortunately however you look at it I do not own the Twilight series or some of its more annoying characters(*cough-Edward-cough*) trust me if I did there would have been some major changes :D-This is a trigger warning story and Female x Female if that makes you uncomfortable then boo hoo there's the door(kicks open imaginary door) I don't have time for homophobic ppl..anyway my lovelies who have stayed this is my first ever Fan Fiction so go easy on me and I have no Beta currently if people like this story later on ppl can ms me if they're interested in the position. OK then Bella is still the same door mat in the beginning but she becomes a total BA...ik nothing about the army and I am researching as I go so bear with me...this is a flashback kinda story leading to this point in the prologue...on to the story...

Date: July ?, 2007

Location: Prison Camp, somewhere in Afghanistan

'_She washot' _was the first conscious thought she had had in god knows how long. She could hear the drips of sweat run from her back to _drip drip_ on the floor. '_Sounds like rain'_ was her next half delirious thought and oh god how she missed the rain and water in general really. In fact at this point in time if asked she would never say she hated the rain ever again...oh no that position was reserved for the merciless sun now. The red hot orb of evil that was currently beating down on her sunburned arms cruelly with no reprieve. Now as her senses slowly came back she could fully register the burning, tugging pull of her arms, the smell of cooked flesh and the terrible gut-wrenching wails of a creature in terrible pain. She feebly attempted to raise her head. Taking in the scenery she saw nothing but '.._sand...I hate sand'_ for miles around. Glancing up she found the source of the terrible pain in her arms. She was tied by the wrists to some sort of structure and apparently left out in the scorching Afghani dessert to hang like a common animal. This also explained her dehydration and inability to turn her head to look behind her '_wonderful...fantastic It's not like I'm part Owl either...My back is left completely open to atta-' _her thought process was cut off as a loud whooshing sound rung in the air and her back erupted in agony, fire lacing and weaving its majestic web. She cried out in shock and pain then bit her lip and screwed her eyes shut determined not to give her captors the satisfaction of seeing her cry. _Whoosh..Whoosh...Whoosh...Whoosh.._her torture lasted 40 lashes before her captor let up though at that point her back was screaming in agony as she fought hard not to lose consciousness. Through her half-lidded eyes she could see a large shadow fall over limp form temporarily giving a small respite from the burning sun. Struggling to open her eyes she finally glimpsed into the face of her torturer.

"You...!"


	2. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

The Plan

Bella's Pov

_16 months earlier_

"_We're leaving Bella."_

_I felt the air freeze in my lungs, suffocating me. "O-Okay..j-just give me some time to talk to Charlie..maybe come up with a reason to lea-" _

_Edward scoffed coldy cutting me off mid-sentence. _

" _You misunderstood Bella...Why on Earth would you need to tell Charlie anything?" He stated looking politely confused. _

"_W-what do you mean Edward? Of course I need to tell Charlie I'm leaving! I can't leave my fath-!" Edward chuckled quietly at first but gradually grew louder until he was heaving for unneeded air._

_I felt a flash of annoyance rush through me for the first time since this began; at again being cut off and for feeling as though I'm at the butt of some terrible joke._

"_Why are you laughing, Edward ?! I really don't understand what is so funny about me leaving my poor dad without a word!" I stated annoyed while crossing my arms over my chest defensively. _

_If anything my statement made him laugh harder. I felt my ire at this entire situation rising steadily. It felt like I was watching this scene play out as a bystander-almost as if I was having an out of body experience. That is the only thing that can explain the next events. _

"_Goddamnit Edward Anthony Cullen! What the fuck are you laughing at?!" I cursed in a rare fit of anger that honestly surprised me. _

_Edward looked dumbstruck, I rarely if ever use any profanity around the century old the surprise was gone as quickly as it came, replaced instead with a cold, unforgiving mask. I felt my stomach drop landing somewhere near my feet. I really took in his appearance then from his gravity defying bronze mop to his dark onyx color irises, his straight nose and god-like features were all the same, in fact he would have been beautiful if not for the hatred and malice oozing in his eyes and the malicious smirk on his face. At that moment he had never looked more like a villain of the night...absolutely monstrous. _

_In a deceptively silky voice he replied, "What am I laughing at you ask?"_

_I nodded wordlessly while wrapping my arms around myself protectively suddenly weary._

_He chuckled quietly then before he was suddenly inches from my face. Dark onyx burned into chocolate brown as his cool icy breath whispered across my lips causing a shiver to wrack down my spine. But it was his reply that stole the breath from my lungs._

"_I'm laughing at you my dear...the silly lamb who foolishly fell for the lion...do you honestly think we are taking you with us?" He said amusingly before flashing his charmingly crooked smile…_

"_W-what…"_

My eyes snapped open violently as I shot up in a cold sweat, chest heaving with uneven breaths. I looked around frantically as I tried to calm my racing heart. Taking in the pitch black darkness of my room only illuminated by the red numbers of my alarm. I sat there a moment glaring as it innocently displayed **3:23 a.m** seemingly mocking my inability to sleep through an entire night since the..._event._ With a frustrated huff at realizing I couldn't possibly win a glaring contest with an object that doesn't blink or have eyes I smacked it off the small stand. Smirking smugly when it landed with a satisfying thud some ten feet away. '_I won' _I thought sardonically before flopping ungracefully on my bed staring blankly up at my ceiling and listening to the heavy downpour that was common of Forks,Washington. '_I hate rain… and the cold'_ I thought angrily as I fought a shiver though not making any effort to pull up the duvet twisted at the end of my bed from the night flailing. Instead I simply took my frustrations out on the ceiling cursing all its imperfections and cracks. Trying desperately to keep my mind off of _him_ or anything pertaining the..._event_ five months previously. Sighing deeply I cast my eyes around my room mindlessly after having adjusted to the darkness. They fell on the brochure sitting inconspicuously on the nightstand where my mutinous alarm clock once resided.

I had simply tossed it on the stand a month previously, not giving them another thought or glance. Not that I had given anything much thought since _they _left. It was a wonder that I would graduate at all considering my lack of care towards anything. In fact, these few months nothing seemed to matter anymore...not school, not my hair-brained mother or socially awkward father..._nothing._ Sensing my thoughts taking a turn down a darker path I turned them away. Instead thinking of the brochure and how I had acquired it.

_I sat in the crowded cafeteria smelling that days mystery food and drifting along with the flow of conversation. There in the physical sense only as my group of friends sat talking and gossiping happily used to my continued silence as had been the norm for the past four months. That's why it was so surprising when I responded to a passing comment._

"_ did you say?"_

_All talking stopped at our table as they all sat in stunned silence. She ignored their prolonged silence though instead fixing her uncharacteristically alert eyes on Mike before repeating her question._

"_What were you saying just now to Tyler?"_

_Mike shifted uncomfortably causing the plastic chair to squeak loudly and snapping everybody out of their shocked poses. _

_He cleared his throat as he began, "I was telling Ty about Lisa Turpin's mini-.."_

_Mike was cut off as I snapped,"No! You were talking about recruiting. What recruiting?"_

"_Oh that!," the tips of his ears turned a violent red as he ducked down to rummage through his backpack. _

"_I was at the shop last week-manning the register ya know? When this dude comes waltzing in dressed all in Army camo," He starts his voice being muffled due to his head still being bent down. _

" _We got to talking and he was asking me all these weird questions, ya know? Like Am I married? Do I smoke or got Asthma? Do I workout often?" He continued as he shuffled through papers. _

" _And I was a little freaked, ya know? Then he started tellin' me I had potential, that I could make somethin' of myself, become stronger as a person or some shit like that." Mike scoffs as he lifts his head momentarily._

_He continues, "I told him I didn't want whatever he was sellin' and that he better buy something or leave," Mike puffs out his chest looking proud as Jessica gasps dramatically. _

"_So he left but not before he says to me 'Son, If you change your mind give me a call' and he leaves his card and this," Mike says victoriously as he brandishes a brightly colored brochure wildly in the air._

_I reach for it automatically. Snatching it from Mikes hand I glance at the cover. It was a dark yellow, displaying a soldier in full gear aiming a sniper rifle with the bolded words 'STAND __**ARMY STRONG**_' _underneath. For the first time in months my heart quickened as I finally felt something other than anger or depression._

_Excitement...Anticipation...for what I had no clue._

"_You're not seriously considering joining are you?" Jessica asks skeptically._

"_I don't know why would anyway...hell with any luck she'd probably trip and fall on a bomb!" Lauren sneers snidely. _

_Angela gasped in shock, "Lauren how could you even say that?! That's terrible! Bella's our friend!"_

_The plastic chair screeched loudly as Lauren stood abruptly, "What? I said what we were all thinking! And don't even try to deny it, 's daughter! We all know Swan is suicidal since Cullen dumped her pasty ass! And for the record, we aren't nor were we ever _**friends**!" _She sneered the word 'friends' as if it was a terrible curse before turning on her heel and strutting off, Jessica following hurriedly seconds later._

_Leaving the rest of the table stunned in awkward silence. Angela turned to me opening her mouth to apologize maybe or deny ever thinking I was suicidal but was stopped by the sound of the period bell. _'Saved by the bell,'_I thought amusingly as everyone scrambled quickly out of their seats, thankful for the excuse to leave the awkward atmosphere. I stuffed the pamphlet in my backpack before shouldering it and walking briskly for the exit, vowing to read it later._

Present

I never did read the brochure though opting instead to leave it on my nightstand for future perusal.

"Better late than never I guess." I murmured into the silent room before reaching over to grab the brochure and turn on the light. Temporarily blinded I waited for my eyes to adjust before glancing at the cover the bolded heading once again catching my attention.

'STAND **ARMY STRONG**'

Once again, I felt the same stirring from deep with in and trickles of excitement tingling my spine and quickened my deep breaths I opened the cover as I settled down comfortably and hungrily took in the words...


	3. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Turning A New Leaf

Third Person POV

Her face was drawn and pale, eyelids puffy and red, eyes bloodshot and dark shadows lied under chocolate irises looking as though she went a round or two with Ali-all in all she looked like crap. But as she sat at the kitchen table with a neatly stacked pile of papers in front of her, brightly colored brochure lying atop it she couldn't stop vibrating with a new energy. Her eyes were drawn to the clock sitting on Pale, yellow walls-**7:55 a.m. **Still to early for Charlie to be up-for any sane person to be up really especially given it was Sunday. Sighing impatiently as she awaited the arrival of her father Bella stared at the chipped and cracked wood grain in front of tracing patterns in the grooves of the wood her eyes moved restlessly to the stack of papers positioned neatly in front of her. '_Her future really' _she thought and it was an odd thought to think. That this seemingly inconspicuous stack of papers represented one of the most life changing decisions she had ever made...it was scary yes...but it was also _exhilarating_..._freeing_. Her mind wandered back to her early morning research...

_She felt as if she was on the precipice of some great discovery..or tragic disaster as her eyes seemed to move at almost vampiric speed as she devoured the information in front of her. Her brain catching phrases as it tried to analyze the new information as fast as she was in taking her back ached from hunching over and her eyes stung from staring at the glare of the monitor so long, but she could not look away as she took in bits and pieces of information, things that caught her eye like, '_Soldiers are strong' _or '_each in individual plays a role' _and '_maintain your nations security'_. As she took it all in the building, crushing sense of _something _started anew in her chest. It was a feeling she had managed to keep at bay for months now and one that had been sorely absent as of late. It was Hope…_

She bolted upright as the first heavy thump of her fathers boots resonated from the top of the staircase. She took a calming breath as she ran a shaking hand through brittle brown locks, grimacing slightly at the rough feel. One thought rang in her head as the sound of Charlie's steps grew increasingly closer…' _He's gonna kill me...'_

~**Author note: Sorry its so short-I'm under a lot of stress but i'm determined to cont. this story...Constructive criticism always welcomed-this is my first piece and i'm researching as i go so bear with me :D**


	4. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Graduation Day

I couldn't help but be mesmerized as I watched the heavy Forks rain pound down onto the car window. My breath fogging the glass as I watched it cleanse dirt and debris from the streets. All the while I could hear his nervous shifting and heavy breathing next to me. Finally after an insurmmountable period of time he breathed a heavy sigh, "Are you sure about this,bells?"Charlie questioned, shifting in the driver's seat. " I mean you don't have to do this, especially right away! You just got your damn diploma for God's sake." He ranted, pulling roughly at his mustache in desperation.

Finally tearing my eyes from the crowd of hopefuls dressed in caps and gowns, smiling and laughing with peers and parents alike. I contemplated my father silently. From his greying brown hair, to the new age lines appearing on a worn face, the slumped over posture as his hands clenched and unclenched on the steering wheel.

"Ch-dad...You know why I have to do thi-" I was cut off by the explosion of words, "You don't have to do a Goddamn thing Isabella! You could go on to regular college just the same as all your other classmates, find yourself a normal and _safe_ job in a- I don't know a library or something! I don't understand exactly what it is you feel you have to prove to that pale ass motherfucker _Cul-" _he didn't get to finish that thought before my own anger lashed out.

_"DON'T." _I screamed at full volume. The car falling into an eery silence only broken by the steady sound of rain. A now familiar stirring of pure fury was rising within =, making my words harsh and biting in the suddenly clastrophobic space. "Don't you ever..." I paused as i struggled to keep my tone controlled, "Don't you ever mention _his_ name to me and in the same breath insinuate that _he's_ the reason for every choice I make. This is MY life and MY story. I'm doing this for ME, so no one can ever make me weak or scared again. So I can learn to fight and rely on myself. So I can be happy."As I said this my volume progressively got louder until I was practically screaming the last few syllables.

Charlie stared at me shocked. His ashen face and red eyes raked over my form as if he was seeing me clearly for the first time-and maybe he was. I tried to imagine what he was seeing. A barely legal girl sitting still in a set of black graduation robes, hair unkempt in a low hanging ponytail, face angular with sharp features-signs of extreme weight loss. _'Jesus...it's a wonder he hasn't had me locked up'_.Identical sets of brown stayed locked for what seemed liked ages before he turned abruptly, turning the key in the ignition and starting the police cruiser. He sat still and stared out the windshield before stating, "Ok." The only sign of shock was the slight widening of my eyes before I turned back to my window again staring out at the graduating Forks High Class of 2005. "Ok." I said with a decide nod. Charlie replied with a jerky sort of nod, putting the car into drive he started towards my future.

_Two weeks earlier_

_I sat nervously at the worn kitchen table. Fingers tracing and retracing the carvings in the wood. Charlie sat still across from me eyes dancing from line to line on the stack of papers I all but threw at him the second he entered the room. He seemed to be have stopped breathing completely as his eyes hit the bolded title of the first document,_**'The United States Armed Forces'**_. As he read his fingers clenched convulsively around the papers. _

_Finally with barely a sound he lowered the stack gently onto the table, as if it was a gutter animal that would bite him at the first sign of aggressiveness. Turning unreadable brown eyes onto the identical set across from him he seemed to stare directly into my soul in that moment. After several minutes of silence he opened his mouth, "What is this?" He looked baffled for a moment, "You don't honestly want to join the -the Army?! Isabelle, you can barely throw a ball let alone carry pounds of equipment and fire an assault weapon! What the hell are you thinking?!" He finished his rant breathing heavily through his nose, seemingly at a loss for words. _

_"Dad...," I paused as I tried to gather my thoughts, my carefully planned speech seemingly vanished under the force of his rage. "Dad...This is something I need to do," I started, "I need to be strong again, I want to fight and be apart of something bigger than me-bigger than this small town. I need find ME and learn skills that will make me _useful _and important."_ _I took in a deep breath before locking eyes once more with my father. " I need you to please accept and trust in me. I need your support with this Dad, please." I pleaded, but as I said my next words I could feel my spine stiffen and my eyes hardened, "I need your support on this but I can do this with or without it. This is what I want and need to do. It's time I finally did something solely for my benefit. I'm tired of catering to everyone's needs but my own."_

_He sat completely shocked by my harsh delivery, before his puffed up posture seemed to deflate before my eyes. He slumped back into the hardback chair, running a tired hand over his face. With a deep sigh, "You're gonna hafta tell your mother."_

**Sorry for not posting in a while and sorry for the shortness of this. Classes and life have been kicking my ass up and down the street. As always reviews and criticism is greatly appreciated-i pumped this out at 11pm so i apologize for grammar errors. **


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